Change is Good, Sometimes
by Ricewind
Summary: Xander runs into Harmony late one night


Newsgroups: alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer.creative  
Subject: FIC: Change is Good, Sometimes - PG-13 - X/H - (1/1)  
Date: Sat, 19 Jan 2002 11:43:17 +0000 (UTC)  
Title: Change is Good, Sometimes  
Author: Nick Kean  
Email: buffy@beast.gen.nz  
Feedback: Always welcome - be gentle  
Summary: Xander runs into Harmony late one night.  
Rating: PG-13 (Themes)  
Spoilers: Set sometime early in season 6  
Archiving: Yeah, go for it. Let me know where, 'k?  
Disclaimer: The characters and universe herein are the property  
of Joss Whedon, Warner Brothers Network, 20th Century Fox,  
Mutant Enemy, Sandollar, Kuzui, and Greenwolf Productions.  
The piece of fan-written fiction below does not intend to  
infringe upon copyright or trademark.  
  
  
  
Scene: Harmony has setup a trap to make capturing victims easier.  
Xander wonders along and suddenly nets drop on top of him, ropes  
ensnare him, etc.  
  
Xander  
(yelling v. loudly)  
What! Argh! Get me out of here!  
  
Harmony  
(walking over)  
Oh shut up already. Why do they always have to be so loud?  
Xander? Is that you?  
  
Xander  
Harmony? Help me out of here will ya. Looks like some  
werewolf hunters have been laying traps again. It's not even  
full moon. Morons.  
  
Harmony  
It's not for werewolves, idiot; It's for people. It's a   
minion trap. And I'm not going to let you out. I'm going to  
make you my slave. You and about 20 others. I think 20 should  
be enough, I've not decided on the exact number yet.   
  
Xander  
(suppressing a laugh)  
So you think that controlling a whole bunch of vamps will be  
easier than handling just a few? And you think that turning a  
very close friend of the slayer is a good way of not becoming  
lunch for a dustbuster? Just let me out.  
  
Harmony  
Oh all right! No need to whine about it.  
(she cuts him free, brushing dirt)  
(from his arms and chest)  
You've been working out.  
  
Xander  
Well construction work does have it's advantages. The fresh  
air, the heavy lifting ....  
(Harmony moves to kiss Xander)  
Hey! What are you are doing?  
  
Harmony  
I'm trying to kiss you. What are you, slow?  
(moves in to try again)  
  
Xander  
(pushing her back)  
Lets back up the 'Girl Interrupted' bus for a minute here. Why  
are you trying to kiss me?  
  
Harmony  
(pouty, confused)  
You don't think I'm attractive?  
  
Xander  
Sure, you're attractive in a kind of Shania Twain / Late Night  
Weather Girl kind of way but here's the think see .. you're  
evil! Creature of the night. You know? Killing people? Not  
really a big turn on for me. You're just not my type.  
  
Harmony  
"Not your type"? That just ... racist. You're a racist and I  
wouldn't want to kiss you anyway.  
(Sits down, starts crying)  
I can't do anything right. I thought being a vampire was going  
to be easy - sleep all day, party all night, eat all the people  
at the party, you know ... fun stuff. I haven't been able to  
kill anyone in ages. All my evil plans suck. At least Spike  
and Angel have excuses for not killing but what about me? Why  
can't I be bad? Because I suck, that's why.  
Now and then, when I get depressed, I think how much it was  
easier when I was alive. At least I fitted in then.  
  
Xander  
(Xander sits beside her)  
If you miss being human so much, why the trap and the turning  
people? I don't imagine that you were putting another gang  
together to raise money for charity.  
  
Harmony  
I don't know. I just thought that it would be easier to attack  
your little Scooby gang if there was a whole bunch of vamps.  
  
Xander  
Attack us? Remind me why I'm not staking you?  
  
Harmony  
(ignoring his comment)  
I've never been by myself before. It's lonely. I went to see  
Cordelia in LA, just to catch up, you know? She was my best  
friend and you know what she did? She kicked me out of town.  
I even tried being good but I screwed that up as well. Can't be  
good, can't be evil, can't be anything except miserable.  
  
Xander  
It's been a long time since high school, you know? People  
change. You've changed most of all.  
  
Harmony  
And whose fault is that? Did I ask to become a vampire? No. I  
never even wanted to be part of your big graduation battle  
thing. But everyone else was going along with it so I did to.  
If I'd known what was really going to happen, I would have gone  
shopping instead. But no, you had to make us all fight that big  
snake thing and I got killed. Thanks a bunch.  
  
Xander  
Look, I'm sorry you died. A lot of really nice people died and I  
wish they hadn't but what we all did that day was the right  
thing to do. If everyone had stayed at home or gone shopping or  
done anything but fight back, where do you think we'd be today?  
Some things are worth dying for.  
  
Harmony  
That's easy for you to say. None of your little gang got  
killed, did they? You got what you wanted and moved on. Well I  
can't. I'm a vampire and I'm not even a very good one. It's  
not fair.  
  
Xander  
No. I guess it's not.  
So what now? I don't really feel like fighting you but I don't  
think I like the idea of you going round recruiting for the next  
"Harmony Gang" either.  
  
Harmony  
Yeah, right. Like you could stop me.  
We could always, you know, go back to your place?  
  
Xander  
I really don't think so. What's with the sudden interest in me  
anyway? You completely disowned Cordy when we got together and  
you've never shown me any feeling other than a deep and profound  
loathing.  
  
Harmony  
You really are stupid aren't you?  
  
Xander  
Gee, you really know how to win a guy over, don't you.  
  
Harmony  
(eyes down, talking at the ground)  
I've always liked you Xander. I was hash to Cordelia because  
... I was jealous. All those years I was mean to Willow; ditto.  
That time in 9th grade when I stole your gym clothes and hid  
them in my locker - I hoped you'd find them and figure out how I  
felt.  
  
Xander  
That was you? You might have returned them. I had to pay for  
a new set myself you know. Why would I have ever look in your  
locker for them anyway?  
  
Harmony  
I'm sorry. How was I to know you'd not be able to put two and  
two together?  
  
Xander  
Math - never my best subject.  
Harm, why are you telling me all this now? You do know that I'm  
engaged don't you?  
  
Harmony  
To a demon.  
  
Xander  
Ex-demon.  
  
Harmony  
Same difference. I figured that you might go for me now - what  
with that mummy girl and that bug lady and now a demon. Is it  
such a big jump to have feelings for a vampire?  
  
Xander  
First of all, I didn't know Ampata was a mummy. Second of all,  
I didn't know Miss French was a giant preying mantis. And  
third of all, I do know you're a vampire and even if I didn't,  
I'd still know that you're a Harmony.  
  
Harmony  
(sighs)  
I didn't think it work out. Had to give it a shot though.  
Barry thought I should get my feelings out in the open if I was  
going to take the next step.  
  
Xander  
Barry?  
  
Harmony  
My therapist.  
  
Xander  
There are therapists for vampires?  
  
Harmony  
I found him in LA. They have therapy for everybody there.  
It's probally illegal to not be in therapy.  
  
Xander  
So what's this "next step" thing then?  
  
Harmony  
Oh that? I'm going to kill myself.  
  
Xander  
What?  
  
Harmony  
Well not actually "kill myself" kill myself. That would just  
be icky. I was going to get together a bunch of vamps, attack  
the Buffy and she would kill us all. Barry called it "suicide  
by proxy". It's supposed to be very therapeutic. But I don't  
want to do that anymore. I want you to kill me.  
  
Xander  
Again with the "What?"  
  
Harmony  
Originally, I wanted to go out in a big blaze of glory, you  
know? A whole bunch of vampires, with me as their leader,  
fighting you Scoobies and eventually you'd kill us. Years  
later you'd all be sitting round reminiscing about it -  
(Bad Buffy imitation) "Remember the day we finally managed to  
kill Harmony and her evil gang?"  
(Bad Xander voice) "That sure was some battle."  
(Bad Buffy voice) "She almost beat us, that's for sure."  
But I don't want that now. I want you to kill me and I want  
something else as well.  
  
Xander  
You're not coming back to my apartment.  
  
Harmony  
Not that. I want you to promise me you'll never tell anyone you  
did it. I want people to think I'm still out there somewhere,  
just waiting for the right time to come back and kill them all.  
I want to be remembered. If people think I'm dusty, they'll  
forget me and that would be worse then being miserable. Will  
you do it?  
  
Xander  
And if I don't?  
  
Harmony  
Then I'll try to kill as many people as I can and it'll be all  
your fault.  
  
Xander  
Figured you say that. Looks like I don't have much of a choice  
then do I?  
  
Harmony  
And the other part? You won't tell anyone?  
  
Xander  
I promise that you'll be remembered - especially by me.  
(they stand up)  
How do you want to do this then? Stake? Holy water?  
Decapitation? Push you into sunlight? It's lady's choice.  
  
Harmony  
I don't know. I never really thought that far. I guess ...  
stake?  
  
Xander  
Then stake it is. And like any good member of the Scooby gang,  
I just happen to have one on me.  
  
Harmony  
Ok. Good. Is it clean?  
  
Xander  
Does it matter?  
  
Harmony  
I guess not. Ok, lets go. Do it.  
  
Xander  
Ok.  
  
Harmony  
(waiting)  
Well?  
  
Xander  
I can't.  
  
Harmony  
You promised!  
  
Xander  
I know but I can't just stake you if you're standing there  
wanting me to. It's weird.  
  
Harmony  
(she vamps out)  
Is this better?  
  
Xander  
Yeah ... a little.  
  
Harmony  
Would it be easier if I attacked you?  
  
Xander  
Maybe.  
  
Harmony  
Ok. Here goes. And Xander ...  
  
Xander  
Yeah?  
  
Harmony  
Thanks.  
  
  
Harmony rushes at Xander and he stakes her through the heart.  
Fade to black. 


End file.
